(c) 2022 Josephine Lombardi

The Carrying of the Cross

The scourging leaves open wounds on Jesus’ back. No doubt, the wood of the cross presses into these sores. The Gospel writers tell us that Simon of Cyrene is asked to help Jesus and carries the cross part of the way. Simon is an example of how we can join our own pain and losses to those of Jesus. Simon’s assistance gave Jesus some relief during this excruciating ordeal.

Our loved ones walk with us whenever we face a life-threatening journey. Their comfort alleviates the pain we feel when a new cross comes soon after another, making the pain feel unbearable. Our crosses involve them, too. We suffer in ways unique to us, and those who love us suffer in ways that may be unknown to us.

Has a loving act of kindness given you relief in times of distress? Can we discern those crosses we are not to carry? Sometimes our good intentions, our desire to protect our loved ones, to cover up for their mistakes or to carry their crosses may lead to a delay in their own conversion process. It takes prayer and discernment to know what type of help is needed. What is certain, however, is our baptismal identity and how it informs our understanding of service and acts of charity.

By virtue of our baptism, we participate in the three fold office of Christ: prophet, priest, and king. Like Jesus, we can offer up our own sacrifices for the sake of others. Pope Saint John Paul II reminded us there is redemptive power in suffering that is joined to the suffering of Jesus. We are an extension of His body. St. Paul was very much aware of this mystery when he, too, offered up his own suffering.

Let us pray for all people who have experienced or witnessed trauma, abuse, and torture. Let us pray for all people who feel overwhelmed with grief, suffering due to the tragic and sudden death of loved ones.

The Third Sorrowful Mystery: The Crowning with Thorns (John 19:2)

(c) 2022 Josephine Lombardi

Not only is Jesus beaten and humiliated, but the Roman soldiers “wove a crown of thorns and put it on his head.” No doubt the pain of the thorns pressing into his skull causes him great agony. The blood would have covered his face, obstructing his vision. They mock him, saying, “Hail, King of the Jews!”

Humiliation and shame often go hand in hand with abuse–the victim is slandered and shamed as part of the cruelty. The aim is to destroy a person’s sense of self, paralyzing them with fear. Jesus knows how this feels. Unfortunately, for some, this sense of shame can lead to self-loathing. This calls for healing, as some people may be convinced that their woundedness and pain are greater than the power and mercy of God. Some may be tempted to create a “god” of their wound and feel they cannot be redeemed or made whole.

Jesus shows us that redemption and restoration are possible. God’s love and grace are greater than any wound that holds us hostage. We do not have to choose struggle and fear, for we can choose Christ, who is in us.

Today, let us pray for all people experiencing anguish and mental health struggles. The inability to perceive correctly, whether it is due to biological, social or psychological factors, can be disabling. Victims of torture and abuse should be remembered here as well. May they be delivered from all evil and may their minds be made well, finding joy and peace in the Lord.

March 23, 2022

(c) 2022 Josephine Lombardi

The Gospels tell us that Jesus was physically beaten and verbally abused throughout his trial. Jesus, an innocent man, is misunderstood, betrayed and tortured for proclaiming the truth. When the crowd is asked to choose between Barabbas, a criminal who was in prison for committing murder, and Jesus, the one who healed many and fed the multitudes, the crowd chooses Barabbas. Emotion, misunderstanding, poor judgment and fear have led to this choice. When we are afraid, our ability to reason is compromised.

Some of Jesus’ actions were misunderstood and criticized. Moreover, Jesus had uncovered the lies of many and had challenged those who were arrogant and proud. Those who are challenged in this way, especially if they lack humility and repentance, will resent the one who exposes their lies and vices. Jesus becomes a scapegoat for the sins of others. Those who fear exposure would rather slander and scapegoat someone else than admit their guilt. The crowd would rather choose illusion and falsehood than truth, because truth demands humility, sacrifice and the exposure of hypocrisy. Many have projected their sins and guilt onto Jesus, and this leads to his suffering and death.

If truth threatens, it is controlled, silenced or killed. Where do you find the strength you need to speak the truth, especially when it is difficult to do so? Have you suffered for proclaiming the truth?

(c) 2021 Josephine Lombardi (Excerpts from Living with the Rosary Expanded Edition available on homepage with a $10.00 donation)

The First Sorrowful Mystery: The Agony in the Garden (Matthew 26:36-46; Mark 14:32-42; Luke 22:39-46)

This mystery reflects the great tension between our individual free will and God’s will. This is especially difficult when we are faced with the possibility of great emotional or physical pain. In the musical Jesus Christ Superstar, Jesus refers to his cup as the “cup of poison.”

Throughout our lives, we need to examine those cups we choose that are not intended for us or for our fulfilment. God may be saying, “I did not ask you to drink from that cup. I did not ask you to make that choice or take on that new cross.” Yet at times, we find ourselves drinking from a bitter cup that we cannot seem to avoid: a new cross has developed in our lives, we are misunderstood, a confrontation needs to take place, a serious illness is diagnosed, or we lose a loved one. The list can go on and on. How many of us ask God to deliver us from these cups? For some reason, known to God alone, there may be times when we are called to drink from them, meaning we are called to endure these crosses. While we know that Jesus is vindicated and rises from the dead, many of us do not know the outcome of drinking our own “cup.” The challenge here is to trust that God’s will does not involve our destruction. God is in the restoration business, not the destruction business. God’s will involves transformation and new life because God can redeem those painful “agonies” when we feel alone. Since the resurrection vindicates love and truth, God will redeem our sorrows as well. There will be “angels” who sit with us as we wait for restoration. Pain can be harder to bear, however, when our pain is made public.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer, in his Meditations on the Cross, wrote that it is infinitely easier to suffer publicly with great honour; it is infinitely harder to suffer publicly with great shame. Has the thought of your pain being made public made you vulnerable? Have you ever publicly shamed someone? “Truly I tell you, just as you did it to one of the least of these who are members of my family, you did it to me,” Jesus says (Matthew 25:40). Mary was bound up in the public pain of her Son. To be public with our pain and vulnerability can be humbling and difficult, especially when we desire privacy.

Let us remember all people experiencing vulnerability and public humiliation: Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for all people experiencing vulnerability, drinking from the “cup” of public humiliation.

Prepared by Dr. Josephine Lombardi

(c) 2021 Josephine Lombardi

December 6, 2021

Dear Friends,

Recently, I facilitated a few Advent reflections on the theme of “Preparing in Hope.” Many participants have asked for some of the content I shared during the retreats they attended. Below, I am happy to share a summary of my reflection.

In his letter to the Romans, St. Paul advises us to “Rejoice in hope, be patient in suffering, and persevere in prayer,” (Romans 12:12). This verse inspired me to prepare a definition for hope: Hope is the habit of waiting with joy, patience, and perseverance. The author of the Letter to the Hebrews describes hope as a “sure and steadfast anchor of the soul…” (Hebrews 6:19), grounding us as we manage life’s many challenges and desires.  This anchor, however, remains firmly planted with discipline and cooperation with God’s grace.

Hope is one of three theological virtues: faith, hope, and charity (1 Corinthians 13:13). Virtues are good habits. Virtues, whether supernatural or natural, are acquired through practice and repetition, sustained with God’s grace. 

In his First Letter to the Thessalonians (5:8), St. Paul says faith and love are like a breastplate and the hope of salvation is like a helmet.  In other words, hope protects the mind, protecting it from discouragement and despair. As a Roman citizen, St. Paul used symbols that would be familiar to others, helping them to understand the gift of faith, making the gospel accessible to non-believers. Moreover, he had hope that our Lord would return (1 Thessalonians 5:23). He encouraged people to be aware and patient as they waited for Jesus’ Second Coming—he was one of the first Christians to prepare other Christians for the Second Coming.

His first two letters, 1 and 2 Thessalonians, were written sometime after 50 A.D. Writing before the evangelists, he urged fellow Christians to be awake and aware, actively preparing for the return of Jesus. We reflect on this theme in the first weeks of Advent when early liturgical readings speak of the signs of the times and the need to be awake, because we do not know the day or the hour when Jesus will return. Furthermore, we are reminded that various signs will accompany His return, inspiring those who are awake to be ready for an abrupt shift in spiritual seasons. The pondering of these themes accompanies the season of Advent.

The word “Advent” is from the Latin Adventus, meaning “going before or coming,” presence,” and “arrival.” Similarly, the Greek word Parousia refers to the Second Coming. John the Baptist prepared the way of the Lord during his First Coming, and we, in anticipation of the Second Coming, cooperate with the Holy Spirit, to welcome Jesus into our hearts and in our communities.

“Keep awake therefore, for you know neither the day nor the hour.” (Matthew 25:13)

The above verse follows the Parable of the Ten Bridesmaids. Like the bridesmaids, we are challenged to stay awake and be ready for Christ’s return. 

During times of preparation and waiting, Christians are urged to examine their consciences and to be reconciled with God and one another. When it comes to the various seasons of our lives, we can learn to adopt this attitude of preparedness. The seasons of our lives can change over night: a new diagnosis, a car accident, a stroke or a sudden loss of a loved one. It’s not a matter of “if,”—it’s a matter of “when,” because we all experience seasons of drought and seasons of plenty. In seasons of emotional and physical drought, we build resilience through trust and hope. In seasons of plenty, we build resilience through building emotional and spiritual stamina. It is in seasons of plenty that we prepare for change. If we are strong and trusting, the abrupt shift of seasons will not overcome us. We will be prepared because we are anchored in hope and strengthened by God’s grace. 

As we prepare to celebrate our Lord’s birth, we can transfer this discipline of preparedness to our personal lives, especially if we are waiting for a desire to be fulfilled. It’s challenging to wait, especially when the desired outcome is something that is truly life giving. Are you waiting for healing? Employment? Relationship? Pregnancy? Reconciliation? St. Paul advises us to wait with joy, patience, and perseverance. Below, I include a few reflections to help us wait with joy, patience, and perseverance.

Waiting with Joy

• Joy is a fruit of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 5:22). This implies that we enjoy this state of gladness or delight when we are connected to the Holy Spirit, the power of God’s love. Joy is not the absence of hardship. Rather, it is the spiritual and emotional state we acquire in an intimate relationship with the Holy Spirit. It is an attitude that must be cultivated. In Nehemiah 8:10, we read: “The joy of the Lord is your strength.” Joy can be understood as spiritual resilience. Have you ever encountered anyone who has carried a heavy cross, but possesses deep faith? Have you noticed a special resilience that carries them through their suffering? When it comes to your own pain and suffering, have you felt a sense of relief whenever you ask the Holy Spirit for help, for strengthening? That relief is deeply connected to joy. Joy, and her sister fruit, peace, come to us whenever we entrust our struggles to the power of the Holy Spirit. In his letter to the Philippians, St. Paul says he is full or sorrow; yet he rejoices, (Philippians 1:25; 3:1). We are not alone—the power of God’s grace carries us during times of struggle.

• St. Ignatius of Loyola advised his companions to set aside time for restorative rest and leisurely activities. Take some time to engage in life giving activities. Pursue truth, goodness, and beauty, that is, transcendentals, or properties of God’s being. Go where there is truth, goodness, and beauty. We have been blessed with the Day of the Lord, Sunday. God commanded us to rest. Give yourself permission to rest.

• St. Teresa of Avila cautioned us to avoid comparison because it robs us of our joy. Don’t compare yourself to anyone. If you must compare, compare yourself with your younger self. Instead, strive for holiness, knowing we are all called to holiness. With God’s grace and our cooperation, it’s a real possibility. Ask yourself, Have you grown? Have you learned from your mistakes? A colleague of mine once said, “Don’t pay attention to what others think of you or are saying about you. Pay attention to what God is saying to you.” Remember, only love is rewarded in the afterlife. Strive to make love your only motivation in all you say and do, and this will keep you from comparing yourself to others. 

• Engage in positive, life giving relationships. Love gives meaning to all relationships. Ask God for the grace to avoid negativity, gossip, and worry. Worry cannot change anything, but prayer can.

Waiting with Patience

• The Oxford Dictionary defines patience as the “capacity to suffer without complaint.” Some biblical translations include “long suffering” in the place of patience. St. Paul tells us that love is patient, (1 Corinthians 13:1). Where there is patience, there is love. Although patience, like joy, is a fruit of the Holy Spirit,  it’s hard to be patient when we are waiting for an outcome, for God’s will to unfold in our lives. Moreover, we experience time differently when we suffer; it seems to drag on and on. Compare this to a time of rejoicing—time seems to pass quickly; you feel a sense of timelessness, like a foretaste of heaven. If you are waiting for an outcome, especially if it is compatible with God’s will, consider the following insights I’ve pondered over the many years of discerning God’s will:

1. There’s a saying attributed to Robert H. Schuller “God’s delays are not God’s denials.” I came across this saying over 25 years ago when I was praying for a desire to be fulfilled. This saying gave me great comfort and peace, knowing God was calling me to be patient. God works in these delays, preparing our hearts and minds for his special blessings. As a fruit of the Holy Spirit, patience is a sign you’re in tune with the activity of the Spirit in your life.

• Another possible reason why you may endure long periods of waiting is God has something better in mind for you. You may desire a certain object, but God knows the best outcome that matches your disposition and vocation. 

• Sadly, sometimes the answer to our request is “no.” This is a tough pill to swallow.  We may not know God’s reasons until we are on the other side of the veil. In order to avoid despair and discouragement, pray for the grace to stay anchored in heroic trust. Trust and patience are sister virtues. It’s hard to be patient without trust. If you are looking for a patron saint to intercede on your behalf, St. Paul is a great intercessor for these types of crosses. In his Second Letter to the Corinthians (12:7), he speaks of a “thorn” in his flesh and a “messenger of Satan” who torments him.  Three times he asks God to deliver him from these afflictions. In response, our Lord tells him that His grace “is sufficient,” that His power will work through St. Paul’s weakness. This means God’s grace will strengthen us during times of affliction, making sure the affliction does not dominate all of our thinking. God’s grace gives us the relief we need to appreciate the many blessings we already enjoy.

Waiting with Perseverance

• Perseverance can been defined as persistence in doing something despite difficulty or delay in achieving something, (Oxford Dictionary). Perseverance applies to all life giving activity, especially our prayer life: “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you,” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).  In this passage, St. Paul connects three key actions: to rejoice, to pray, and to offer thanksgiving. Joy helps us to keep praying, and prayer helps us to be mindful of the many material and spiritual blessings in our lives. It’s hard to persevere when we lack joy, stop praying, and neglect the importance of gratitude. On the Third Sunday of Advent, known as Guadete Sunday, Rose Sunday or Sunday of Joy (guadium in Latin), we rejoice because the Lord is near.

• The parable of the persistent widow (Luke 18:1-8) is a wonderful account that inspires hope for desired outcomes. The persistent widow experiences justice because she did not give up. Resist the temptation to quit praying, or to quit believing altogether. Don’t stop praying through the struggle. Although we may not experience the outcome we desire, God will give us the outcome we need to flourish and grow.

• Howard Storm, a Christian pastor, who experienced a conversion due to a near-death experience, knows the power of perseverance. He, like St. Paul, was obnoxious and arrogant before his conversion. He was a professor at the time of his experience, and he shares that, before his near death experience, he was quite abrupt and rude to a nun who was a student in his art history class. He made it clear to her that he did not want her to share anything about faith and religion in class: “There’ll be none of that here!” Many years after his conversion, he ran into her; after telling her about his conversion, he apologized for his behavior. She said something like “It’s about time. I have not stopped praying for you!” She persevered in prayer and God gave her the grace and satisfaction to see the fruits of her efforts. She, like St. Monica who prayed for the conversion of her son, St. Augustine, knew the power of intentional prayer.

• Dr. Larry Dossey, a medical doctor and researcher, has studied the power of intentional prayer. When our prayers are motivated by love, “willing the good of the other for the sake of the other,” (St. Thomas Aquinas) we will see the best fruit. Be persistent; be consistent; and persevere in prayer. 

As we continue to prepare our hearts and minds for Jesus’ coming into the world, may we be joyful; may we be patient; and may we persevere. 

“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I say, rejoice.” (Philippians 4:4) because…

“I am confident of this, that the one who began a good work among you will bring it to completion by the day of Jesus Christ.” Philippians 1:6

In my award winning book, Experts in Humanity, I distinguish between the external curriculum of our faith, and the internal curriculum. The external curriculum, I explain, consists of catechesis and doctrine. This content has been handed down throughout the centuries, beginning with early Christian writers, Sacred Scripture, the teaching of bishops at councils, creeds, liturgy, and liturgical art. These pillars of Sacred Tradition hand on what theologian Yves Congar calls “the living memory of our faith.” This content is vital to the transmission of our faith, from generation to generation.

There is, however, a complementary curriculum, the internal curriculum, that is, instruction on the inner life: how to be; how to live; how to love; how to pray. The internal curriculum is the focus of my book, Experts in Humanity.

Over the past few years, I’ve continued to research and build on the content of my book, exploring in more depth the various factors that influence human behaviour. This research has inspired the creation of a new online course, The Experts in Humanity ProjectTM. If you are interested in learning more, please visit the course page on my website. I look forward to hearing from you. Please consider taking this journey with fellow truth seekers. The course begins in January 2022 and meets every other Monday night at 7pm EST, beginning on January 24.

Dear Friends,

Many thanks for the overwhelming show of support and encouragement regarding the premiere of The First Lady and Her Successors. I’ve received many wonderful emails and messages, telling me how much the film touched you and inspired you. I’m delighted to share the film will be available for viewing on the Feast of the Visitation, May 31, 2021 at 7pm for 24 hours.

Some of you have given me permission to share your feedback. I’ve included some of your heartwarming comments below.

“Dr. Lombardi what an incredible film. I didn’t think I could get closer to Mary but you brought me even closer to her. A deeper understanding and love for the woman that make it possible for us to be forgiven by her son.” – Sandra

“Words cannot describe the joy in my soul. This movie was so powerful. It has brought a deep beauty inside. I am so grateful to have been blessed to see this film. What a wonderful job Dr. Josephine. Bravo. I wish I could have access to this regularly. It has left a profound stamp on my heart. God bless you for taking this initiative to bring Our Lady closer to us in our minds and hearts.” -Teresa

“I just finished watching the film and I don’t have words to express how amazing it was!! WOW, WOW, WOW!!! Dr. Josephine did a wonderful job at capturing our Lady in every aspect of her being. She was able to make us see that she is approachable and she is our Mother that we can always turn to her for hope, strength, and intercession. Wishing her all the success in the world that many people will watch this film and have their lives transformed and that she will lead us all to her son, Jesus.” – Gina

“The film left me speechless! What an incredible gift!!! I hope it will be viewed over and over by many. An extremely valuable tool for reflection. All the sharing by the beautiful women in the film, touched me profoundly and took me deep into my own heart. Dr. Josephine seamlessly navigated everyone through the rosary mysteries as a mother lovingly takes her children through a beautiful garden. I am in awe. So well done. A wonderful tribute to our Blessed Mother and all her successors…including Dr. Josephine Lombardi! The presence of the Holy Spirit was evident. Thank you so very much, Dr. Josephine !!! God bless you.” – Felicia

“Bless you Dr. Josephine and thank you!!! What wonderful work you’ve done–an homage to our Lady!! Daniela always says Our Lady is my favourite person–in less than two hours–based on scripture, personal testimonials and art you were able to transport me to a time of deep reflection–filled with only thoughts of the Mother of our Saviour!! Thank you for sharing the stories of her successors! Women who have experienced joy, sorrow and hope–all with Our Lady’s guidance!! Wonderful and important work!! Thank you and all these women for being incredible teachers…Thank you again and God bless you.” -Linda

“Our beloved Mother Mary has always been a source of safety fo me. Someone I can go to and feel protection and guidance. I often try to stand where She was in Her life and find the peace She must have had to live Her life. You, dear, Dr. Josephine Lombardi, have made our Blessed Mother even more relatable in your incredible film. In showing us that the way these amazing women you interviewed hear and answer the call to encourage other women. To follow in the simple, humble and loving footsteps Our precious Mother left for us. I am grateful to be able to take part in so many beautiful events that celebrate Mamma Mary and this film was by far one of my favourite! May God continue to bless you Dr. Josephine Lombardi with the ability to teach us and allow us to experience our faith in a more mature manner. Thank you! – Carm

“I just wanted to say I was invited to watch the film…and I was amazingly struck in awe of watching this testimonial…Dr. Josephine brought an amazingly new and simple perspective on Our Lady…my heart was touched as the mysteries were explained and made real. I like to think that I always had a relationship with Our Lady however this film brought a new simple way and real way to view Our Lady…I was thinking that something like this should be available to so many for I believe it is valuable. As a man it would be amazing for other men to watch this for it teaches the value of women…I could go on and on but just wanted to say thank you and God bless Dr. Josephine in this work and may Our Lady guide this film in living rooms of many families…God bless and thank you.” -Frank

“That was beautiful and inspiring! You (referring to Mary Luciani) were eloquent and wise. And lovely! How wonderful to have a presentation of an aspect of our faith articulated through the life our Holy Mother and shared by women. The richness and how it resonates in our life as women was demonstrated with such beauty, wisdom, and gentleness. Thank you for sharing this with me.” – Carrie

“What a lovely and inspirational film this was. First Lady, indeed and the one whose faith was bigger than her fear.”

-St. Elizabeth’s Villa, community chaplain.

“All I can say right now is WOW! What impressed me was the superior art work that told the story so well. It must have taken many hours just to search for the art. The art and the dialogue during the mysteries show what a wonderful God we have, how special Mary is and how she always said yes to God’s will. Also, what a loving mother we have in Mary. The quality of the women who were interviewed were amazing–their great faith, their knowledge and life experiences that showed their level of trust and love. The whole script was woven so beautifully together. I can’t even imagine the amount of prayer, work and time that went into this movie. It encouraged me to see these spiritually mature women who are making a difference in religious education at the adult level. I liked the end of the story when the lily bloomed at important times. What a wonderful touch of God’s love. Thank you for this opportunity to see this movie.” – Friend of Patricia Coulter

“Beautiful presentation about our “First Lady”. I was moved by the personal poignant stories. There was a calm peaceful energy throughout. It is such a beautiful and powerful message. My sincerest thanks to Josie for sharing the moving video with us. As a woman, mother and seeker it touched me deeply on many levels. Wonderful! Thank you!” Friend of Patricia Coulter

“What an amazing treat. I loved it. Josie did an excellent job, and her voice is calm. The story of Mary is told in a beautiful way with scripture. There is so much in it I will be thinking about if for a while. It gives praise to God and honour to Mary.!” Friend of Patricia Coulter

Many thanks to all!!! Please pray for the film as I discern next steps.

In Christ,

Josephine

Josephine Lombardi, Ph.D.

Professor, Author, Consultant

March 29, 2021

http://www.josephinelombardi.com

(c) 2021

In their book Character Strengths and Virtues: A Handbook and Classification, Christopher Peterson and Martin Seligman propose the rediscovery of the study of character and virtue because they believe character can be cultivated. These authors, like Aristotle (384 B.C. – 322 B.C.) and St. Thomas Aquinas (1225-1274 A.D.), writing centuries before them, believe it is worthwhile to take some time to nurture and develop good habits through practice and repetition.

Aristotle, an ancient Greek philosopher, was one of the greatest thinkers on the topic of virtue. According to Aristotle, virtue, the habit of behaving in the right way or in the right manner, is learned or acquired through repetition. Similarly, the Book of Wisdom (8:7) teaches, “And if anyone loves righteousness, her labors are virtues; for she teaches self-control and prudence, justice and courage; nothing in life is more profitable for mortals than these.” Clearly, ancient authors understood the benefit of acquiring cardinal or natural virtues.

Becoming a virtuous leader involves a process, learning foundational habits, which are interconnected and necessary for a leader to become integrated and courageous. Corporate leaders, with a sincere desire to grow and lead with virtue, moving beyond the perceived superficiality of virtue signaling, will benefit from working on the following six habits: humility, magnanimity, courage, prudence, self-control, and justice, habits examined by many classical and contemporary authors. Virtue living involves more than the act of expressing an opinion—it involves discipline, authenticity, and concrete actions.

Definition of Virtue Signaling: “The action or practice of publicly expressing opinions or sentiments intended to demonstrate one’s good character or the moral correctness of one’s position on a particular issue.” (Source: Oxford Language Dictionary, 2021).

Humility

Twenty-five years ago, one of my favorite professors asked a classroom of graduate students, “What does it feel like to be in my presence?” This question has stayed with me throughout my professional career. My philosophy professor was training us to be self-aware, cultivating the habit of humility or knowing the truth about ourselves. She was modeling virtuous leadership, showing us humility was the first step toward becoming a virtuous person. 

It can be frustrating to work under a leader who lacks self-knowledge, who doesn’t know her presence and behavior make people feel micro-managed at best, paranoid at worst. A humble leader takes the necessary time to work on her self, investigating her thoughts, words, and actions, observing whether they are life giving or destructive, apologizing when she has made a mistake. Sadly, pride keeps some leaders from being vulnerable enough to look within and examine troublesome behavior. 

Magnanimity

Magnanimity is the habit of striving for excellence. I recall the story of an administrator who experienced great difficulty saying no to new requests. She found herself running from meeting to meeting, struggling to complete projects by deadlines and failing to delegate when she could. After several years, she went on maternity leave and was succeeded by a very competent leader. After the successor’s first year of service to the company, a mutual friend told the predecessor that she spent the year comparing the leadership styles of the two administrators. She told the former that she did ten things 90% and the latter worked on one thing at a time 100%, meaning the successor strove for excellence and precision, asking for help with other tasks. We get sloppy when we try to do too many things without delegating or asking for help. Setting priorities and knowing ourselves, including our gifts, helps us to strive for excellence. 

Courage

Virtuous leaders work on being brave. Aristotle, in his Nichomachean Ethics, expressed the importance of being habitual when it comes to facing our fears. A brave leader enters the arena, ready to compete and to be victorious. A brave leader resists the temptation to quit, especially when he is afraid. Endurance builds character and helps him to investigate his fears using his ability to reason. When we can face what is fearful, Aristotle says, we can become brave, “and when we have become brave we are most able to endure what is fearful,” (Book II, Nicomachean Ethics). A brave leader, having cultivated the habit of knowing the truth about him self, strives for excellence and resists the desire to be liked by everyone, trusting he has made the best decision. Becoming brave involves a process rooted in truth and clarity, whereas fear can make us irrational. 

Prudence

Brave leaders are prepared to be prudent in decision-making. A prudent leader, according to Aristotle, is someone who is “able to deliberate well concerning what is good and expedient” for herself and the community she serves, (Book VI). Prudence is the habit of reasoning well and the ability to act accordingly. A prudent leader gathers information, seeks advice, and makes a decision after she has investigated and examined competing views, searching for the truth and the best outcome for her community.

Self-Control

A prudent leader exercises self-control when it comes to the expression of emotion and opinions. A leader who has worked on self-control can express anger the right way, without damaging relationships. Impulse control is a necessary virtue in all levels of leadership. An impulsive comment can poison a workplace environment, creating a climate of fear and recklessness. Remember, you can take back a thought; it is increasingly more difficult to take back a comment. Make sure your feedback is rooted in facts. If you are not sure, ask the recipient of the feedback for clarity. Self-control is informed by prudence and humility. Moreover, it takes bravery to confront truthfully, yet tactfully. 

A method I use in my course on counseling is called the sandwich method. This method has been proposed to leaders who have difficulty sharing critical feedback, evaluations, or making requests. The method consists of three steps: critical feedback or a request is positioned between two affirming comments. In giving critical feedback, the leader giving the feedback uses “I” statements, not accusatory “you” statements. Dr. Judith Orloff, M.D. explains the benefits of using this method here: https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/the-empaths-survival-guide/201807/how-the-sandwich-technique-can-transform-your-relationships

Justice

Finally, a virtuous leader is just. Justice, writes Alexandre Havard, author of Virtuous Leadership, is the habit of “giving others their due.” The just leader, says Aristotle, promotes that which is lawful and fair. Giving someone his due can mean praise/ reward or discipline. If an act of mercy, meaning the act of extending graciousness or a second chance whether someone is worthy of it or not, does not change someone for the better, a correction is in order. A just leader knows how to manage the tension between justice and mercy. Possessing self-knowledge and prudence, he is able to read character, knowing when someone is exploiting his good nature or is ready to learn from their mistakes. A wise leader has nurtured his intuition and has acquired knowledge of the human condition. 

In conclusion, Aristotle claims, “no one who is to become good will become good unless he does good things,” (Book II). Happiness, he says, is the result of virtuous living. After much practice, a virtuous leader makes the transition from virtue signaling to virtue living.